Kid Kit Obsession
by CrazyWriter
Summary: FINISHED. Someone has a crush on Dawn... but has it gone too far? Please read and review! Rated for violence and adult themes.
1. Chapter 1

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Kid Kit Obsession

I don't think Kristy ever thought this would happen when she came up with Kid Kits. They're such a simple idea... cardboard box, filled with a few games, markers. Dime store stuff. But it's new to the kids, so they get excited.

And when I started getting notes in mine, I was excited too. They were sweet. _"I am always thinking of you." "You're way prettier than any of the other girls."_ I spent the whole job grinning, thinking of who it could be.

I have always loved babysitting but now I think it's chillier than ever. It seems like every time I go, I get another note in my Kid Kit. They're always things about my long blonde hair or my California Casual sense of style.

I've had to watch it though. One day Charlotte Johannsen tried to read one and I had to grab it out of her hand. I thought she was going to cry...Good thing I had some dumb book about a pig in there to distract her with.

I tried to think, who could my admirer be? I ran through the list of boys at school. Alan Gray would certainly do something like this, trying for attention. Maybe Pete Black, but he'd always liked Claude... who?

The notes started dropping hints. _"I love what you said in English last week." "Seeing you at meetings brightens me day."_ That's when I knew it was a club member. Of course, I wasn't interested... but I was flattered.

It's always nice to know that you're admired and appreciated. And honestly, sometimes I felt that I didn't quite stand out as much among the club members. I mean, Claudia was so artistic, while Stacey could be a model! Not to mention Mary Anne's compassion or Kristy's leadership skills and Jessi's dancing. But then...oh, dear...It could be from Mallory as well.

It was only a month or two later that things started getting strange. The letters began to talk about things that I didn't think I'd told anyone about..._ "I love your pajamas with little trees on them." "I'm sorry you were crying yesterday after school."_

Immediately I suspected Mary Anne, but I knew it couldn't be her. My stepsister?! Gross. I mean, she knew about my pajamas anyway and that I liked to listen to old Beetles songs before I went to sleep. But when she went out of town to visit some family friends with Richard for two days, there was a new note.

I still felt special. I mean, someone liked me so much that they wanted to know my secrets. But... why wouldn't they reveal themselves? I wouldn't love her, but I could be her best friend. We could share our secrets. And she seemed to want that closeness.

_"I wish I had you all to myself,"_ one note read.

I thought about it a lot, as I sat in club meetings. Who here loved me? And why? For a while that specialness continued. Until the notes started to get more possessive.

_"Why were you talking to Austin yesterday? I can't believe that you would do that to me!"_

Even then, I wished she would reveal herself so that I could explain that I was asking Austin about the math homework.

That made me think it was Stacey, because she'd always liked Austin and maybe she was worried her two loves would leave her for each other? What could be more awful than that? I started sitting really close to her at meetings, suggesting we hang out, but she always wanted to bring Claudia along, which made sense, since shopping is a drag without her. But if I were so special, wouldn't she only want me?

The real mistake I made was accepting an invitation to the dance. I wasn't even that into Doug Stokes, but he was nice and I didn't want to be the only girl not asked. And hey, he thought I was special too. So I said yes.

And my admirer said no.

_"What were you even thinking?! Don't you care what people think at all? What about how I feel? Boys are only after one thing! You slut."_

I cried so hard, shut in the bathroom at the Perkins' house while the girls were asleep. I couldn't believe that my friend, this person who'd been sending me special little notes and thoughts would think such a thing of me. All the girls knew I'd barely kissed...How could she think I was a slut? Little did I know that it would get worse...

I remember the first time I found a note in my bedroom! I was so scared! But there it was, pinned to my pillow. _"I'm sorry I got angry. I just can't stand the thought of someone else loving you."_ I shouted and when Mom came in, I told her it was a mouse. Thank goodness, living in a colonial house is useful sometimes.

I wished this girl would reveal herself so I could assure her I did love her. I loved all the girls. And then we could work this out and I could explain everything, and I don't know, we'd go to Pizza Express together sometimes and it'd be okay. I wanted a best friend too, what with Mary Anne being torn between me, Logan, and Kristy all the time.

But she still didn't reveal herself. And things just got worse. When spring came and I started wearing shorts, I started getting letters alternating between how nice I looked in them and how much I must be loving the attention from the boys. I just didn't understand what to make my secret friend happy again. When I wore jeans, she didn't like it; when I wore shorts, she didn't like it and when I wore skirts, she hated it.

I just wanted things to be like they were in the beginning again. Sweet notes and my dreams of a true best friend at last, one I didn't have to share or beg my parents to let me call long distance. But instead I got someone who wanted to control me. But I convinced myself that I could still find a way to figure things out, I just needed to wear the right things and smile at the right people and frown at the others and everything would be all right again.

It wasn't possible though. When I joined the peer math tutoring program, I got paired up with Alan Gray and my admirer went ballistic. I tried to drop out and Mom and Richard made me stay in. When I threw a fuss, Mom even called my real dad in California. He said they were worried, that Mom said I'd been withdrawing. When I tried to tell him about the letters, he blew me off, saying girls said silly things sometimes.

My admirer did everything she could to convince me how important I was. When I stayed in math tutoring, she threatened suicide. When the program ended, she said maybe she'd reveal herself. When I mentioned at a club meeting my month long visit that summer to California, there was a note on my bed that night saying she'd never let me go. Even grosser there was a dead rat underneath it. That made me think it was Kristy. What other girl could kill a rat?

I started a calendar marking off the days to California. I couldn't wait to go. I thought maybe I'd be able to stay there this time, forever and never have to deal with my admirer again. Of course, she found the calendar, even though I was keeping under my bed. That's when I realized she must be coming in through the passageway.

_"I love to watch you sleep...But I can't stand the thought of you leaving me..."_

I just couldn't concentrate on anything but my fear. I jumped at every little noise and tried to push my dresser in front of the passage. Of course, that made her even angrier. I didn't even know some of the names she called me in the letter but I do remember this:

_"I will kill you before I let you wall yourself off from me."_

I asked Mom if I could go to California early and she said no. I tried to tell her about the noises and the passageway and the letters and she just laughed, telling me some of the jokes she and her friends played at my age. No one was taking me seriously, except my admirer-- my stalker.

In school one day, she left me an animal heart and a note._ "In medieval times, people ate the heart of their one true love. Gross, huh? But I'd do it for you. I would sooner eat your flesh than see you fly away from me."_ I shuddered and went home sick.

Then one day it happened. I was babysitting the Arnold twins and hadn't read the Kid Kit note yet. I just slipped it in my pocket. I didn't want to be upset in front of Carolyn and Marilyn and fortunately, they misbehaved just enough to keep my mind occupied.

I let out a gasp when I opened it._ "I want to reveal myself to you. Meet me at Old Hickory's grave at midnight tomorrow night. Only in the place of eternity can our endless love be revealed."_

I was so excited. I mean, I knew I should be scared but this was it! We were finally going to get a chance to talk about our feelings in person so that we could really understand where we were coming from. I kept looking through the notes for any clue at all. I thought that maybe some of it looked like it had been written in colored pencil. Maybe it was Claudia! She was so pretty and artistic and wild. I hoped it was Claudia.

I would have been fine if it was Abby too. She was still mysterious to me and so strong and athletic! She could protect me from anyone. Who could it be?

I was so excited as I picked out what I would wear. My admirer liked my California flair, but if it was Claude, I needed to be a little wild. I picked out a jean jacket covered in patches. Worried that I'd need to be sophisticated if it was Stacey, I managed to put a little make-up on neatly.

My stomach in knots, ready to find out who I meant so much too, I boarded a bus towards the cemetery. Was it Jessi? She could teach me to dance. Even Kristy would be cool. She was really smart. Anyone but Creepy Mal, really.

My California cool was lost to my nerves as I stepped towards Old Hickory's headstones. It was dark and even though it was almost summer, it was still chilly at night. I pulled my jacket tighter around me. My admirer was late. I glanced at my watch. I jumped nervously at every twig snapping. I waited and waited...

... and that is the last thing I remember.

I woke up in the hospital. Apparently I'd been found alone in the graveyard, barely breathing. Someone had hit me on the head with a rock and left me there. To die alone. And this is after she's told me she loves me. Who could do such a thing? Who? And why would she think she had to?

But you know what the worst thing is? I don't know who it is. I don't know which of my friends who visited me is really my friend and which one picked up that rock. When they left the hospital room I found a note on the nightstand. All it said was:

_"We'll never be over."_


	2. Chapter 2

**Continued by popular demand!!!!!!! Keep the reviews coming! This chapter is in Claudia's perspective first and then Dawn's!**

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_**Chapter Two**_

_**CLAUDIA**_

Someone hurt Dawn.

No one knows who did it or how it happened. No one was arrested, no one confessed. The police don't even have a lead. Oh my Lord, but thank goodness she's okay! It took her a while to get back on her feet, but now she's back and we're all supporting her.

Except for me.

I'm hanging back. I love Dawn so much and... well, no one knows for sure who hurt her.

But I think I know.

I think I am the one who hurt Dawn.

People love my wild sense of fashion. Today I'm wearing a jean mini skirt that I made myself, a bright orange tank top, one of my father's ties and one of Janine's green and brown argyle cardigans. I also have on heels that look like men's shoes and HUGE hoop earrings.

But they don't know that often I'll put together an outfit the night before...I used to even have normal ones, like skirts and tops that actually didn't clash...But I end up at school wearing something completely different. And I have no idea how I got there.

Not only don't I know how my outfit changed, I don't even remember how I got to school. I remember the first time it happened, I was in sixth grade. I somehow ended up in a bowling shirt with 'Ray' stitched across the front and I was behind Stoney Brook Middle School, by the dumpsters.

Who was Ray? How did I get his shirt? It still smelled like cologne. What had happened? Had he hurt me? Had I hurt _him_?

It wasn't the first time I had blacked out. I'd been losing time since I was a very little girl. It's why I never learned how to spell. But that was just moments here or there, five minutes at most. No, it was the day with Ray's shirt that I first lost hours.

It's been happening more often ever since. It's risky for me to be a babysitter, I know, but so far I haven't compromised a job. But... could I have been stalking Dawn in moments I didn't remember? Could I have lured her to that graveyard and left her to join the dead buried beneath the Earth?

Have I underestimated the evil that might lurk in the darkest part of my soul?

How can I even live with myself? Walking down the street towards my home, I am convinced that everyone sees the creeping poison ivy choking out what used to be any goodness left in my soul.

First, I hurt Dawn. What will happen next? Will I hurt Stacey? My parents? Did Mimi even really have a stroke...Or did I hurt her somehow? I always knew it was my fault. Everything ends up being Claudia's fault. Stupid, stupid, stupid!

The next thing I know, I'm in my room. It's 5:15. The last I knew, it was 4:00 and I was leaving a sitting job. What happened between then and now? Why was I no longer wearing my fishnet stockings? How can this be? Why are there so many questions in my life?

I try to calm myself down. _Breathe, Kishi, breathe_. The more worked up I get, the more likely it is an attack will come on. I lay down on my bed. Food, I need food. I reach behind my pillow and pull out a package of Sour Patch Kids. I can do this. I can pull myself together.

The sugar hits my tongue and I start to feel myself relax. Janine knocks on my door. She's come to comfort me, offer homework help. She think the reason I've been so crazy lately is because I'm afraid what happened to Dawn will happen to me.

It's true. Even I am not safe from myself.

I look at Janine. Even though she's mean to me sometimes, I know that she's always been there for me in the past. I think she used to cover for me when I blacked out. I just don't know if she realized it. But I need help. I desperately need help. I should talk to her. Oh, My Lord, please give me the courage to talk to my sister! If anyone can help me, she can!

When we were kids, sometimes we'd have fights I couldn't remember and when I got confused and started crying, Janine would take the blame. I look at her concerned face and so same tears sneak back up again.

But suddenly it's 9:00 pm and I'm not in my room anymore. I'm on cold, wet grass, face down, offering myself to the Earth. Where am I? I stand up and look around.

I'm outside the Schaefer's barn.

Have I come for Dawn?

Did the demon within decide now was the time to finish the job?

"NO!" I shout, and turn to run back towards my own home. My feet pound the pavement, thud, thud, thud, like a judge's gavel, declaring that I...

I, Claudia Lynn Kishi, am guilty.

_**DAWN**_

I never could have believed it was Claudia. She always seemed so warm, so caring. But she admitted it. Poor Claudia. To not remember what you've done! Her parents have put her in a hospital. She'll become medicated and I'll become safe. It'll be fine. Someday she'll be okay again and maybe we can be friends.

I am safe. I keep repeating it to myself as I go to the Newtons.

I keep her confession letter with me all the time, so I never get convinced my attacker is still out there. I reach in my pocket and pull it out.

_Deer Dawn_, it reads, _This is my confeshun. I never mint too, but it was I who attacked you in the sementery. I was not myself._

The police weren't sure at first when Claude confessed. The handwriting wasn't a match and she had some alibis and plus, the letters were all well-spelled. But they didn't have another suspect and Claudia and her… alter-ego, I guess, could have had different handwriting. No one knows. She was a different person. And if the police believe it, so do I.

I'm so relieved. Since Claudia was unwell, it means none of the girls hated me. It means my friends never betrayed me. And soon Claudia will be back on her feet and back in the club! Life will be normal!

I pull out the Kid Kit for Jamie for the first time in weeks, maybe months without a horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach. It was like reaching into a box filled with snakes, filled with spiders, filled with vampires, filled with pure evil. But this time it was good.

But in between coloring books and paper dolls, there was a familiar folded shape of paper. A note! Had this been left by Claudia before she went to the hospital? Was another girl playing a trick? Maybe it was a note of encouragement from one of my friends.

My heart stopped in my chest as I read:

_Dearest Dawn,_

_Did you think we were over?_


	3. Chapter 3

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**This chapter is in **_**Mary Anne's**_** perspective!**

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_**Chapter Three**_

Everyone says it was Claudia, and I guess she confessed but... but I'm still worried about Dawn. And a little disappointed. Why disappointed? Well... well... I just.... I just wanted it to be Kristy. I wanted it to be Kristy and I wanted her to be caught and I wanted her to go to jail. There, I said it.

I wanted my best friend Kristy Thomas to go to jail.

Kristy's a great friend most of the time, smart, caring, but she's also controlling. Judgmental. Sometimes mean. And when you're her friend-- her _best_ friend-- all of those qualities come out ten times.

I remember the first time I realized it wasn't normal. I had gotten to the meeting before Kristy and Claudia and Stacey were talking. Stacey was going to hang out with Charlotte Johannsen and do something "sister-y" that night and Claudia didn't seem to care. She truly didn't seem to care. There were no harsh words. Not one.

If I would've done that to Kristy, at the very least she would've shouted. Told me she didn't understand why anyone other than her wanted to hang out with me. It got worse when I met Dawn.

I don't want to seem like Kristy was crazy. She wasn't crazy. Just jealous. She'd been abandoned by her dad so early and well, she didn't want to be abandoned again. That's what I tell myself. But even that changed when Dawn moved here.

All Kristy would talk about was how cool Dawn thought she was, how she thought she was so pretty and so hip all because she was from California. I didn't think Dawn was even half as arrogant as Kristy made her out to be. But Kristy was obsessed. Mention the sunrise and she'd be off on a ten minute rant about Dawn.

Kristy's never been violent towards me, but she's so intense that I think she could be. She likes dissection in biology class a lot. Sometimes when she hits the ball in a softball game, I swear it's like she's swinging a bat at someone's head. Probably Logan's. She hates him.

Truly hates him. I know she puts up a good front, but I don't think we've ever had a conversation about Logan that doesn't end with her saying that I should just break up with him.

And let's not get started on what I wear. Everyone seems to think that I dressed the way that I did for so long (kilts, button downs, my hair in braids) for so long was because of my dad. Of course, I didn't correct them and he certainly didn't mind my being modest. But in reality it was all Kristy. She made fun of me when I tried to dress in anything new. Once, when I wanted a sleeveless tank top...She told me that the boys (especially Logan) would all think that I was a _slut_. It wasn't until I went shopping with Dawn that I realized that I could buy clothes that were modest and in fashion.

Kristy's been fixated on me for so long. That's why I'm worried that it was her. Claude's so sweet and artistic. Even if she does have some mental problems, I don't think that she could ever do that. But Kristy. Kristy could. Remember the rat? Claudia hates rats. Can't go near them. But Kristy could.

Maybe I'm just focusing on these little things because I want it to be Kristy. Dawn still seems skittish, but everyone says it's just the after effects. Sharon murmurs things about feeling violated and Dad checks the locks three times every night. Sometimes I hear him getting up at two, three am, checking them, if he wakes up and worries. He's a worrier. But this time that's good. I want Dawn to be safe.

Everything's been really hard with Claudia gone. If Kristy's the mind of the BSC, Claudia is its spirit. I'm probably it's eyes, always crying. We meet at Kristy's house now, which is way across town, but Watson put a phone line in on their third floor and some couches. It's more posh, that's for sure, than Claude's bedroom but it's a hassle to get there and way less junk food. I don't know how much longer the club will stay together. I don't like going there and I worry about Dawn every time I do. Kristy always wants me to stay after meetings.

Maybe that's why I want Kristy to be stalking Dawn: I just want to know what life would be like if I wasn't her obsession.

Poor Claudia. I think her family's taking it really hard too. I saw Janine yesterday at the middle school, I think she was picking up some work for Claude, and she looked really upset. I poked Dawn, who was talking to Austin Green and she agreed that she'd never seen her so emotional looking before. You know it's bad when Janine is sad.

Another reason I want it to be Kristy...I think she'd be able to handle the publicity better. Claude's always been so sensitive. There's been so much gossip. Yesterday, at the meeting, Creepy Mal was saying that she always thought Claudia watched her too much and that she would've been her next victim. I'm so sure.

The hardest part for me is that Dawn doesn't even trust me. She won't confide in anyone. I'm sure it's not because she thinks I'm the one who stalked her (what if she does?!), but just that she can't let anyone be close anymore. But we're sisters! She should trust me! I would never, ever, ever hurt her.

… but then why do I wish that Kristy was obsessed with her instead of me? I'm a bad sister.

I keep coming up with plans to save Dawn (_From what? Claudia confessed!_ my mind reminds my heart). I've thought of telling Sharon and Dad my suspicions, hoping they'll order us from the BSC, but would that make Dawn safer? Honestly, babysitting seems to be her only bright spot. Sometimes. Sometimes she bounces back in the house, bubbling forth with stories about how Jackie Rodowskey lost his new hamster in the fridge. Sometimes, not often, but not few either, she's sullen and runs straight to her room. I think those are the days she's remembering? Or is she still getting notes?

Besides, she wasn't babysitting the night Claudia-- Kristy-- _someone_ left her to die in that graveyard.

I go into Dawn's room, intending to comfort her but she's not there. Instead I find a note crumpled up on her bed.

_Darling Dawn,_

_Do you feel safer now?_

_Love, _

_Your Secret Admirer_


	4. Chapter 4

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_**Chapter Four**_

_**Dawn's Perspective**_

I stood in the doorway for what felt like minutes, watching Mary Anne holding a note over my bed. I didn't want to be frozen, I wanted to yell at her, to shake her to demand to know how she could do this, but it was like the wind had been knocked out of me.

Finally the life slipped back into me, I was suddenly moving too much, too fast, shaking my fists, yelling at Mary Anne, how could she do this to me? It was like being controlled by something other than myself-- and I was. The same thing that controlled me all these months. My fear. My pain. My violation.

But when I see tears streaming down my sisters face, my anger just crumpled up and blew away. I take a deep breath and decide to just ask it. I've got to know. "Mary Anne, are you my secret admirer?"

Mary Anne looked like her heart was breaking. Seriously, I thought that I'd seen Mary Anne sad before but this time is even worse than the time she lost Tigger or Logan told her she looked fat. It looked like her soul was leaking out of her eyes along with the tears. I didn't know what to think. Did that mean it _was_ her? Oh my god. What would I do? How could I ever escape someone who lives in the next room?

Mary Anne finally sniffled and blew her nose on her sleeve. I was actually kind of glad that Richard isn't around to see that.

"Dawnie, of course I'm not...How can you even think that?!" She went off into a fresh shower of tears and I started to cry too. Tears of self hatred, of distrust, of shame.

For a long while, we just sat there, sobbing into each other. It felt so good to cry with someone, to know that my secret admirer wasn't my secret alone anymore. I'd been too afraid to tell anyone, to make Richard and Mom worry again. I wanted to believe it was Claudia, because then I'd be safe, and to be honest, 70% of the time, my heart could fool my mind, and I'd feel safe, thinking of my hated friend behind bars, the psychosis in those almond-shaped eyes. But then there'd be a new note and the almond eyes in my mind would fill with sadness, not insanity, and my heart would ache for the wrongs done to both me and Claudia.

That day was another note day. I'd been attending a lecture on Global Climate Change at Stoney Brook State University, with the rest of the Young Sierra Club. I'd been bubbling with excitement and righteous indignation when I went to get my backpack and a note fell on the floor. The same note Mary Anne was holding.

Finally, still holding each other tightly, we trailed off into ragged gasps and sobs. I looked closely at my stepsister, wearing a dark blue minidress with a button down shirt over it, white leggings and ballet flats. Kind of different for Mary Anne but still calm and in fashion. Just like her.

I couldn't believe how many times I got side tracked these days. But it's because I'm trying not to think of Claude in an institution and my stalker out of it.

"Dawn...Your secret admirer hasn't stopped? Have you told anyone?"

"No...I can't tell. They didn't believe me before. They'll never believe me."

"But you have the notes!" Mary Anne cried! "And everyone _knows_ what happened! And this means it wasn't Claudia! Dawn, you have to tell someone! You're not safe!"

"It doesn't mean it wasn't Claude," I snapped defensively. "I mean, the notes are less frequent now, it could just be a dumb prank. And no one's attacked me again! It's probably just a copycat, like Cokie Mason!"

"Or Kristy." Mary Anne said darkly. "I always thought it was Kristy, even after Claude confessed."

The gravity of Mary Anne's tone, the sudden dark wisdom in her voice chilled me, colder than the first time I'd stepped into a Connecticut winter. I pulled my knees to my chest, wrapping my arms around them, huddling, stonewash jeans cradled by stonewashed jean jacket. After a second, I regained my strength, untangled myself and tossed my long blond hair.

"It can't be Kristy," I said firmly. "She's my friend, she'd never hurt any of us."

Mary Anne bit her lip. "Kristy's just very possessive sometimes... I don't hate her, it's not her fault, she's so afraid of being abandoned but... sometimes she's too possessive of me, Dawn, and that might make her hurt you."

I looked at Mary Anne. I'd never realized it, but she's right. The terror in her eyes and the way she holds herself showed me that Mary Anne had her own problems. I felt bad for never noticing. Sometimes I know I'm a horrible stepsister.

Maybe it is Kristy, but then I remembered she'd been forced to go visit her dad and new stepmom for a week when I got 3 of the notes. I reminded Mary Anne this and she looked slightly less suspicious.

"I don't know...Kristy's pretty smart. She's got all kinds of ideas. Maybe she thought up some way to have someone else give you the notes."

I remember the days when the mysteries we were solving were about whether two sisters ever spoke again or where a diamond ring was. They rarely actually dealt with life and death.

I wanted to cry again. I'm only 13. What did I ever do to deserve this?

No one is home, so Mary Anne and I snuck down the kitchen to make some hot chocolate. I'm not big on sweets, but sometimes they help, and besides, the kind Mom buys is soy-based, which, despite resisting at first, Richard and Mary Anne had to admit wasn't bad.

Sitting at the kitchen table, Mary Anne and I discussed what to do. She wasn't convinced that it couldn't be Kristy, but we both agreed it probably wasn't Jessi, who was too busy with ballet to stalk me.

"Do you think it's Creepy Mal?" I asked.

"Don't call her that!"

"Everyone does!"

Mary Anne blushed guiltily. "Not out loud. Be nice, she can't help that she's so desperate to be cool."

I frowned. Mary Anne is so nice. "If it's a copycat, it could be Stacy. She's Claude's best friend."

"Dawn, we need to tell Dad and Sharon!"

"We can't," I said firmly. "They'll worry and won't be able to do anything anyway. The police couldn't find my stalker until Claude confessed and even if it isn't her, she's getting treatment now for her black-outs!" Mary Anne looked unconvinced. "It's up to us, Mary Anne. You and I. We can find my stalker, we can do anything."

I finally feel like I'm taking control of my life. My sister and I will free me from my stalker and no one will be able to hold me.

Mary Anne looks up at me and grabs both my hands across the table.

"All right. We'll do this together."

I met her gaze, locking her brown eyes with my blue. "But you can't say anything. Swear, as sisters, to keep it a secret."

Mary Anne swore.


	5. Chapter 5

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_**This chapter is **_Mallory_**'s perspective and written before she goes to boarding school!**_

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****Chapter Five**_

Claudia Kishi is one of the most popular girls at school. Maybe even the most popular. Everyone knows that. Just like everyone knows that Mallory Pike is not a popular girl. Don't think I don't know what everyone calls me. All one has to do is walk into a school restroom to see my number and moniker "Creepy Mal" graffitied.

It's not my fault. It's not even the glasses and braces. It's being chased around by seven obnoxious shadows. Every time someone likes me, my "entourage" scares them off. Take Ben Hobart, who was so sweet, until he got fed up with Vanessa's incessant rhyming and my cutting our "dates" short to take Claire potty. Of course, it _probably_ didn't help that I called him 46 times the day we broke up, asking him to reconsider. Stuff like that spreads around school.

But there's one thing I've learned. Life isn't fair. As a writer, I am familiar with these harsh facts about humanity. Sometimes, you have to make your own destiny and with Claudia away, there would never be a better chance for the world to meet the Real (Cool) Mallory Pike.

I think about it for a few minutes and pull out my journal from under the bed. It's purple and has a glittery unicorn on the front. I usually use it to write about boys, fairies, mice and what clothes I'm going to buy when I'm grown up. But not this time. This time I'm going to make a list.

_How to Become Popular!_

_1. Claude is popular._

_2. Become more like Claude_.

I sigh happily. This list is going very well. I even started it earlier today. On my way home from school I stopped in at the Kishi's. They thought that I was there to keep them cheered up and play with their new Irish setter that they'd bought. But I was really there to sneak into Claudia's room. Right now I'm wearing a pair of dirty jeans that I think used to belong to one of the triplets and a blue t-shirt with mountains and a howling wolf. My hair is frizzy. I have glasses and braces. But tomorrow, in the bathroom at school, I'm going to put step two into place. I'm going to wear these clothes that I got from Claudia's closet. A pair of lace trimmed leggings that she tie dyed puce and olive, a red polka dotted tank top (midriff, of course) and I'm going to put my hair into six braids! It'll be hot.

I put the clothes in a paper bag and stuck it on the highest shelf in the room I share with the Maggots (that used to be my nickname just for Margo, but its so catchy I use it for all of them now). It'll be safe up there. I go back to my trusty unicorn notebook and start a new list.

_Ways To Become Claudia!_

_1. Wear crazy clothing!!!!!!!_

_2. Crazy hair!!!!!!_

_3. Beautiful Almond-Shaped eyes (Parents will probably continue resistance to plastic surgery idea)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!_

_4. Stalk someone!!!!!!!!_

_5. Be bad at math!!!!!!!!!_

_6. Bribe friends with unlimited supply of junk food!!!!!!!!_

_7. Make art!!!!!!!!!!_

Most of these were pretty easy. Since my parents wouldn't let me spend my babysitting money on cool clothes or piercing, I had enough saved to keep my friends in ding-dongs for the foreseeable future. The clothing could now be stolen from Claudia's. A failing math grade was no big deal for a writer like myself and if no one could understand my art, they'd assume it was good.

I was a little worried about number 4. I mean, should I stalk Dawn? Would people think less of me if I just went and stalked Claudia's stalkee? Is there some kind of etiquette for these things? I could just stalk Kristy. When I think of the hazing she puts new members through, I really want to stalk her. But then again, it might be best to just play it safe. I could stalk Dawn. I know where the secret passage is and everything. Plus, I really do like her hair. I could write her stories about a princess with long, golden hair! She'd love it! Then I could one up Claude and actually have her like me.

I wondered who the other popular girls at school were stalking. I know someone (probably Cokie) put some weird stuff in Jessi's locker last year, something about Supremacy, but she didn't seem very flattered (which is just like the ego-queen-fairy-dancer, I'd kill for someone to think of me as supreme!) It was clear to me that you had to pick your stalkee very carefully, since the rumors that I stalked Ben Hobart had done little for my rating on the popularity index (and I wasn't stalking him, it was Claire who liked to sit in front of his house for hours in the rain!) Well, Claudia knew better than me, so Dawn it would have to be. And I'm a way better writer than Claudia, so I'm sure she won't be scared like she was before.

I took out the new rainbow kingdom stationary I got for my birthday and uncapped a trusty sparkly blue pen.

_Fairest Dawn,_

_How your golden locks fall so freely from your perfectly formed head. How I long to chop them from your scalp, to make an off-the-shoulder blouse from those perfect threads. You are the prettiest girl in school, you're lucky I don't have a hatchet!_

_Longingly,_

_An Admirer Whose Identity Can Not Yet Be Known._

Perfect, I thought, recapping the pen. I would be popular before you could say "a mouse in the Waldorf Astoria!"


	6. Chapter 6

_Hi, guyz, sry for the wait on this one, busy week, yeesh. Ur reviews make us want to rite all the time!!11_

_This chapter is in THE STALKER'S perspective. Yay plot developy!_

_**Chapter Six**_

I almost tripped over a ledge in the crack of the concrete as I hurried up the walk to the doors of good old Stoney Brook Middle School. As I steadied myself, I saw her coming out of the main doors.

Her.

She was wearing a pale blue jean jacket, with a loose seafoam green blouse under it, a top a long-flowing purple skirt. She was perfect. I could almost smell the sea coming from her.

Quickly I ducked behind a car and checked myself in its tinted window. I looked fine. A little on the conservative side, but my skirt hung well and I'd taken time to really color coordinate this morning. When I stepped out from behind the SUV, she saw me and waved.

"What are you doing here after school?" she asked. "You didn't join the Young Sierra Club did you?"

"Yes, I decided that it would be good for me to get more involved in some school." I sigh and sneak a look at my Dawn out of the corner of my eyes. I want to brush her long golden hair out of her eyes...Wrap it around myself.

I shake myself out of my reverie... Hurriedly I look at Dawn, she's saying something.

"I haven't heard anything about Claude lately. Have you?"

I shake my head quietly and pat Dawn on the shoulder. She's so worried about Claudia hurting her. Claudia who thinks she's so bad. So evil. Oh, well. I must do what I must to make sure that I'm able to be close to my Dawn. Someday Dawn will understand, I know that she will. When we're together forever.

Some people would never understand how I could let Claude-- one of the people I'm closest to-- take the wrap, but she's getting help now. Her black-outs were real. So really, I'm helping her. And she's helping me get closer to my beloved.

Dawn is so jumpy and I know why. I messed up in the graveyard. I just-- I wanted all my feelings, my longing, the yearning to go away and I though that if she did... if she did, then well, can't want what's not there, right?

Who am I kidding? I would always want her, even if I stilled her with a killing blow.

"I like your button," I blurted out awkwardly, my eyes falling to the "Save the Whales" pin that clung to her blossoming bosom.

"Really?" she said, unpinning it. "Here, take it, we have plenty at the club."

Her delicate hand pressed the memento into mine. "I'll... treasure it." She laughed.

"It's just a button."

Someday I'll tell her that I'm the one who wrote the notes. I think that she'll like it. I hope that she'll like that I love her. I hope that she'll love me. I'm smart and graceful. Sensitive and loving.

But just as I feel her about to surrender to me, she's turned and moved up a step. There's someone else. Laughing and talking to Price Irving. I know that they went to a dance together once. Slutwhore. How can she talk to him when I'm right here?! Doesn't she know that I love her? How can she not feel it? Why doesn't she want me the way that I want her?

I look down. I tighten my hand so much that the pin jabs into my palm so hard that I've drawn blood. How trite, anguish from her love gift. Doesn't she care that she's causing my pain. Of course she doesn't! The little...

I take a deep breath. She doesn't know. I must just try harder to make myself a room in her heart. I must send more letters. Maybe some phone calls too. I will have her.

But then... then it is as if the sky opens up and my destiny returns. As Price goes on ahead, she turns back to me. There is a storm brewing in those blue eyes. When I first began to love her, I called her Mazu, the Chinese Goddess of the Sea. There is an ocean in those eyes, with a tiny black island of sincerity.

"Can I trust you?" she finally says quietly.

"Of course," I say, grabbing her hand. She doesn't flinch. She looks on the verge of tears.

She brings a much folded piece of paper out of her pocket. "I need to tell someone about this...I've still been getting letters."

I look down at the piece of garish stationary, filled with sparkles and glitter pens. Clearly it's not from me. Who dares!?

"Actually...I think this one is from Creepy Mal. It's different from the others...They're the ones I'm worried about. Can you help?"

I nod my head and manage to sputter out a few words.

"Of course, I will!" She mistakes my fury for passion. "I will always protect you, Dawn! Claudia's already in pain, I won't let another life be ruined!"

Dawn looks relieved. Myself, I'm just beside myself. How dare this Mallory Pike try to steal my Dawn! She doesn't have the brains or the looks or the talent to attract her. All of the work and calculation I put into this. Hanging around after BSC meetings. Tutoring her math class. I even took a babysitting job at those disgusting Pikes when all the girls were booked just to be closer to Dawn.

Mallory Pike will not take hedr from me.

She will not bring the last year to ruination without as much as a word of protest.

She will not tempt my perfect Dawn to sin with her.

I'll deal with her later. Right now I need to comfort my Dawn. In my rage, she's gotten ahead of me. As I look up she starts walking and calls out to me,

"Janine?"

My name sounds so perfect from her lips.

"Janine? Are you coming?"


	7. Chapter 7

**Hey gyz, thanks for the reviewz, sry some of u don't like the way the plot is going, but give it a chance! We are tryin to take ur feedback into consideration and make a story we all kin be happy wit…… sry about the Clade/Claud mistake, it's fixed in this chappy!!! Hope u all had a good VD!  
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**This chapter is in both Janine and Dawn's perspectives.**

_**Chapter Seven**_

**~~JANINE~~**

_It was a thrill to be in Dawn's room, invited, in daylight, for the first time. I had barely ever even been in her house before, waiting downstairs for Claudia after a sleepover. Once, we all came over when Dawn's mom had a neighborhood party for the Spring Equinox. My parents were quite pleased with her wheatgrass punch and I admit to finding it tasty myself. Claud of course hated it, but that's why I'm more deserving of Dawn's friendship. We care about the same things. The environment, our body, social betterment. And I had been in there from the passageway, leaving my love notes on her pillow, but this was different. This was standing, welcome, basking in sunlight, in the presence of the radiance of my sea goddess._

**~~DAWN~~**

I'm so happy that Janine agreed to help. She's seventeen and takes college classes and even helps out at SMS. That makes her almost like a grown-up, right? I need help with this; Mary Anne and I can't do it on our own.

I invited her over so we could have more privacy when we talked about my...problem. I look down at the ground. It hurts to even acknowledge it though...The loss of privacy, the loss of self it's given me. I never know when she's watching. How can I live like this?

I realize that I'm sobbing out tears of salty pain when Janine starts patting my shoulder. She gathers me into a hug but I pull away and sit down in my desk chair.

**~~JANINE~~**

_ I try to gather her in my arms, but like the sea water she represents, she slips through my grasping fingers. I brace myself, to not seem upset by the rejection._

_ "I'm sorry," she gasps through the heartiest of sobs. "I just... I feel so unclean. Like I'd make you bad by touching me."_

_ "Oh, Dawn," I say, in my practical voice, the one I use when I tutor her classmates-- never her, she is too brilliant to need such aid-- the comforting one, I think. Patience. "Oh, Dawn, this isn't your fault. You didn't ask for this. This happened to you, not because of you." I offer her a Kleenex from the desk. Her striking blue orbs are impossibly more beautiful when they shimmer with tears._

**~~DAWN~~**

I look up at Janine as she hands me a tissue, just wanting to hold onto someone, anyone. I am surprised at the look of compassion and pain...Like she knows my pain...In her surprisingly beautiful almond shaped eyes. We had all thought that Claude was the pretty one in the Kishi family but Janine is beautiful in her own way.

I know that my stalker has hurt Janine too. She and Claudia didn't seem close, but they were, they are sisters... and to watch Claudia's madness be revealed to everyone, to have to visit her in an institution... Yes, my stalker has hurt many people. And Janine knows that. I've never liked girls but after all of this, I can't imagine like liking anyone so... I could settle for kindness and compassion. For someone to protect me and hold onto me... when I so desperately hold onto them.

**~~JANINE~~**

_ My love unfolds the letter the pretender Mallory Pike penned her. I can't help myself. I grab the letter from her hands and tear it into shreds. I am beside myself with a jealous rage. How dare she! How dare that frizzy-haired ginger approach my goddess? I am worth ten-- a hundred-- of her and even I am unworthy. How dare she._

_ Dawn looks at me in shock. "Thank you!" she whispers finally. "You're so right. I need to destroy the letters. All of them. Then my stalker can't control me!"_

**~~DAWN~~**

I go to dig under my bed where I kept all the letters. All the pain, all the suffering. I will burn them and be cleansed in fire. Then I will be free to love. But I still must catch the person keeping me imprisoned. And Janine can help me. We must lay a trap.

**~~JANINE~~**

_ I almost blush at the way that Dawn is looking at me. Like I'm her savior. I've dreamt, often, of that. I must just decide a way to make her feel safe, make her feel like her stalker is truly gone. Now that she knows it's not Claudia, silly little Claudia, I have to find a new patsy. Mallory Pike might work somehow...But I don't want her to have the credit for the beauty and poetry of my letters!_

_Of course, if she thought the previous ones were Claudia and the new ones were the Pike girl, then maybe her nightmare could be over... I never intended for this to be a nightmare. I wanted it to be a beautiful fairy tale dream. But her fear made me fear and then our demons spun out of control..._

_ But. I can fix this. I'm a genius and more to the point, I'm lucky. Mallory Pike will take the fall for this. I shall turn her into the shriveled shrewish villain of our play and then I shall ride in on the whitest of steeds, my jet black hair flowing behind me. _

**~~DAWN~~**

Janine looks so wise as she figures out a plan, I can almost see the computer that is her brain calculating. "I think you should respond to your stalker," she tells me excitedly. "Tell them you will never read another letter until they agree to meet you. In public, so you can be together. Say you love them too much to be a part from them this long. They'll fall for it."

She's so wise. I'll leave the letter in my Kid Kit. I just want to surrender this. I'm so tired. I'm so... so done.

**~~JANINE~~**

_As she pulls out my letters, I realize she's kept every one the police didn't take as evidence. It's a beautiful monument to my love. I remember how long I've longed for her. When she first came into our house for a BSC meeting, I was blown away by her beauty but as I lurked outside the door listening, I heard her talk about the environment, her urban perspectives. She was different. She had thoughts. I knew what it was like to be different, just for thinking. Even the kids in my college courses aren't as passionate. How could they be? They're just drunk 18 year olds at a glorified community college. My ex-boyfriend, Jerry, he had been smart but not intelligent. He could build a computer but he couldn't think about how it would serve mankind._

_ Dawn cared about the world and that made her so beautiful for me. I knew she would be interested in my experiments on sustainability. And she was so gorgeous, her laidback attitude was a breath of fresh air. So I watched her. I waited around outside BSC meetings, listening for Dawn's voice. I tried to get them to let me drive them to and from meetings, but Charlie Thomas was always there. I listened in on Claudia's phone calls, for even a scrap of information. A story about something Dawn had done. I started volunteering around SMS. I filled the hours previously empty with Her. And slowly, plain, "dull as dishwater" (I heard Stacey say this to Claudia) Janine was filled with passion for the first time. My solitude was no more a shelter. I wanted... a companion. An equal. A love._

_ As I watch her burn the letters, the evidence, to leave for Mal, to frame her, I see redemption in that fire. Like a phoenix, I too will rise from ashes. Our romance will be built on these ruins, this time honest and strong._


	8. Chapter 8

**Hey guyz, I no sum of u havn't liked our plot as much lately but this is wut we planned when we decided 2 finis the story, so i hope u will see what we had in mind!!! We think its a killer endin'!**

**Rating upgraded for violence, squeamish avoid!!!!!!!!!!!!**

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_**Chapter Eight**_

_POV Janine:_

In a beautiful testament to how connected our souls are, Dawn followed my advice and wrote the letter. It was agony watching her struggle over what was the best thing to do. I wanted to stroke her porcelain cheek and tell her it would all be over soon. And it would be. Mallory Pike would be dealt with and then, then Dawn and I could enjoy our beautiful future. Being as bookish as I, one seldom believes in white knights and sunsets and the riding there into, but maybe my fairy tale would come true after all...

The plan was for her admirer to reveal herself at the school dance, Dawn claiming to want to share just one dance with whoever loved her so passionately. I tingled at the thought of her sweeping around the dance floor, her elegance illuminating the dreary middle school gym, blinding all to its tacky decorations and missing ceiling tiles. How that room would be altered for me, having before been a gloomy chamber of desperation in my own middle school days, now changed to the palace of my enchantress.

I walk to her and put my hands on her shoulder. I thrill to the touch of her strong shoulders and smell the clean scents of lemon and mint wafting off her hair. She's began and crossed out several starts to her letter until she finally got to this:

_Dear Admirer,_

_I can no longer live like this. I want to know who you are, I need to know. Please, at the SMS dance on Friday (I'll be wearing a sea-foam green Laura Ashley dress, so you can find me in the crowd). Dance one dance with me. I'm going to request "Every Breath You Take" because it's so romantic. That's the dance I want you to dance with me._

_Dawn_

And then, as happens with geniuses, a flash of brilliance came over me. I would prove my love by Dawn for solving the problem for her. I wouldn't make her suffer such a confrontation. And then I would stroll, confident and proud, jet black hair flowing in the wind, love in my almond-shaped eyes, and claim that magical dance with her.

It took several drafts, but I finally mimicked her writing well enough. I invited Mallory to meet Dawn in the girls' locker room instead. I knew what to do from there.

The days until Friday crawled along at a glacial pace, but I was thankful for their slothlike pace because each minute brought a new fantasy about Dawn and I's future. A cottage in Wisconsin. A lighthouse in Maine. A condo in Los Angeles. Perhaps a quiet life in a Stamford suburb not unlike ours... I didn't know if I wanted children with her. We could both throw ourselves into our passionate work. With my smarts and her activism, we could make alternative fuel a reality.

But first I had to make us a reality. And finally, as was inevitable, Friday came...

I was hiding in the showers in the SMS girls' locker room when I heard someone coming in the room, mumbling to herself.

"Gonna be cool...Gotta be cool...Just like Claudia...Not be Creepy Mal...God, I wish this sweatshirt had glitter."

I looked down at my hands. Small hands. Good for computers and test tubes and Mead notebooks. No one knew that they were stronger that they seemed. That I worked out in the university gym three times a week. But I was strong. And not just physically. But mentally strong. Strong enough to hit Dawn with a rock, to frame my little sister for my crimes, strong enough to make the life for myself that I knew I should have! I am strong enough!

I didn't realize that I had said the last few words aloud until I heard Mallory gasp.

"Dawnie? Are you here?" Then, very woodenly, as if she had memorized it, "I love you. Let us be together forever, like two princesses in a fairy tale."

I moved into the light and saw the shock on her face until I brought the bat down on it. Again and again.

I didn't think it would sound like a watermelon breaking. That's my favorite fruit.

As I had planned, I wrapped her up in the tarp I bought, chuckling to myself that she would have appreciated its purple hue. Her body had stopped twitching. "Guess you're Sleeping Beauty," I cackled to myself. I covered the shower in chlorine and ran it, to drain away the blood. Dragging the "package" behind me, I descended into the basement through a service elevator. I had already left a suicide note on Mallory's desk, unicorn stationary and written in three different colors of pastel sparkly gel pen. The Pikes would think their eldest daughter had drown herself in the Stoney Brook River but in truth, along with my bat, gloves, and old clothes, Mallory was going to be cremated in the school incinerator. It took a whole hour to get everything going and shove her body in but haste makes waste, you know.

"Maybe your prince will come," I cackled as I shut the door. I had plenty of time to change into the clothes I had stashed. A Laura Ashley dress that matched Dawn's. It was my first dress like that. I normally prefer a degree of modesty in my garments, but longing so for Dawn had made me wish someone might long for me.

I twirled around the room, wearing my dress and singing softly to myself. Now that I think of it, I would like children with Dawn. I can see her playing with them and taking care of them after I come home from a long day at the university. She'll be the best mom in town, the one that everyone wants to have on their committee. All our children's friends will want to play at our house, even if we only have raw vegetables and carob brownies.

We will have the perfect life. I cannot wait to stroke her long Californian hair.

I squared my shoulders and marched proudly up the stairs, out the back entrance, and then around the building and into the main doors. I had to be seen entering. I had been hiding around the school since 8 am, sneaking in with the crowd of students at the morning bell. I was hungry and tired, but has much as I craved edibles, I craved Dawn more.

I waited outside the gym until I heard the requested song. 9:03, just like we'd planned. Strolling in, I saw Dawn standing awkwardly in the middle of the floor, her lower lip trembling. She was trying so hard to be brave. I came up behind her and wrapped my arms around her.

"I love you," I whispered in her ear, "Mallory isn't coming. I took care of it."

Dawn jumped back, looking confused. "What are you talking about, Janine? Why are you here?"

Although I wanted to shout with anger at her appalling lack of gratitude, I calmed myself, a force of will. Relationships aren't easy. And Dawn was damaged. I would have to explain this. I convinced her to come with me so I could do just that.

I took her to the science lab. It's where I feel most comfortable, most able to discuss things calmly. I should have thought that she might be a little nervous at the beginning, but now I have the chance to make her love me. So I've got to say it right.

"Dawn...Dawnie...My California Girl. I noticed you the very first time you came to our house for one of our meetings. You were always nice to me, always offered me a Saltine or whatever you were eating. Once you patted my shoulder when I got an A- on a calc test. And I guess what I'm trying to say is that...over time...I fell in love with you." I laugh and look at the ceiling. It feels so good to say it! I finally got to say it.

But when I look back down, Dawn doesn't look as happy as me. First she just looks confused...But anger and disgust seem to be visiting her face too.

"What?! You are my stalker!?

I interrupt, "It's not like that! I just love you so much and sending you notes was a way to be close to you...Until I was brave enough to tell you the truth."

"How could you do that to me?! How could you do that to Claudia?!" Her voice swiftly rose to an unmelodious shriek.

I cover her mouth with my hand and continue to whisper words of love in her ear. I tell her of our future, of our four children: Newton, Marie, Darwin and Seashell (Yes, I knew that was the name that she wanted to name a child someday, I heard her tell Mary Anne one night).

I don't even know how it happened. I was clutching her so close, whispering to her about how Claudia _was_ sick and now she could helped and that Mallory had sent her to the awful notes (sometimes love requires a white lie) and that I hadn't stalked her. I had loved her. Watched her protected her. I _killed_ Mallory for her. When she didn't react to my confession, I knew something was wrong. She wasn't breathing. I was clutching her so close…

I tried CPR at first, savoring my first contact with my love's lips. It failed.

But I am Janine Kishi. I never fail.

Even if I couldn't save her life in one way, I could preserve our love in another. I could let her live through me. I could absorb her life essence into my being. There could be a storm crashing in my eyes too. Dawn needn't fade away.

Yes, this science lab had seen so many of my successes over the years. And tonight, as I did my greatest feat, it would forever be the palace of my victories, the chamber that held my most awesome power. As I placed Dawn on a lab table, I mentally ran through the instruments I needed and fetched them quickly from the cupboard.

Cupping her beautiful face, I ran the scalpel around her eye sockets, removing the skin. I was so careful not to cut those beautiful orbs. They were like a snowglobe, but for the ocean. They would be mine. I dropped them onto a tray. Her lips came next, perfection that I wished could kiss me back. Part of her brain. Yes, that was her essence from there.

Moving lower, I made incisions on her torso until I was looking at her organs. I gasped at the site of her perfect organs, so neatly aligned. _Beauty truly is on the inside_, I thought. The choices were clear. I removed her heart, which I know, I _know_, I _KNOW_, held so much love for me. Her lung came next, I knew they were clean of toxins, that her love of the environment had strengthened them, giving out her vigor. I took her liver, knowing it too had no toxins, for her beautiful diet. Yes, my princess had treated her body as a temple.

And now I would worship at that temple.

I took great care to be gentle as I lifted out each jewel. I didn't want to be rough and quick. To _violate_ her. Finally I removed an ovary for our unborn child and some of her muscle tissue, to remind me of her strength. I pictured her lithe form surfing. God, how I still loved her.

And then, salt running down my face, I did the last thing I could for my love.

I let her inside of me.

I read once about how in the Middle Ages, when your love died, you ate their heart. How sad for those great romances that they stopped there. As I ingested her essence, masticating each perfect morsel with love, I knew I had never been closer to Dawn. That as much as I had loved her, this was how two souls became one.

Plato theorized that love was a result of humans being split apart, that we had been beings with two heads and four arms and so on, but our arrogance angered the deities. They split us in two and made us incomplete. I knew he had been right. As I felt Dawn slide into my stomach, to be broken down by acids and made part of me, I knew her nourishment was the completion I needed.

I, Janine the Brain, had never been happier.

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_POV Kristy:_

_~~~17 YEARS LATER~~~  
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I dream of it sometimes. I'm at the head of what will always be left of the BSC. Mary Anne, Stacey, Jessi and Abby. We'd figured out that it was Janine too late and as we ran down the hall we didn't think that we'd see Janine there, her lips glistening scarlet as she ate Dawn.

Oh, god. How could we have all missed it? How could we have missed the insanity growing in Janine's eyes. Why didn't we pay attention to the many times we saw her at SMS. We just assumed she was volunteering or that she missed Claudia. But no.

And it all ends with scarlet lips and violence and screams, and Janine in a padded room and Mrs. Spier drinking herself to liver failure.

I'm married now. Mary Anne and I finally admitted our love. I make her feel safe, I know. We have a daughter named Seashell Dawn.

But sometimes, in the night, we awake screaming and we know we see the same thing:

Janine sobbing out her love for Dawn through her moist, ruby red lips.

_**FINIS.**_


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